11 Reasons to Vote
Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 5:02 pm
11. Because this is the most important election of our lifetime, (unlike, say, 1996, which was, like, totally lame. Why did they even have an election then?)
10. To shut up all those "If you didn't vote then you can't complain" people.
9. Because if you don’t vote, the terrorists win (unless you were going to vote for the terrorists, in which case they win anyway).
8. Because people in Iraq braved violence and long lines to vote for their ineffectual government, you don't have to brave either to vote for yours.
7. Because this year Al Franken will literally beat the shit out of you if you’re not wearing an “I Voted†sticker.
6. You would like a different politician lying to you for the next two/four/six years.
5. You want your voice to be heard, and the old woman down at the polling station can't leave her post so she'll have to listen.
4. You like to stand in line and pretend you're waiting for a Wii or Playstation III.
3. Perfect opportunity to check if your e-vote hack is in place.
2. Because you're tired of all the Republican scandals and abuses of power, and would like more Democratic scandals and abuses of power.
1. To relive those test taking days in college when you just filled in the circles randomly hoping to get some right.
10. To shut up all those "If you didn't vote then you can't complain" people.
9. Because if you don’t vote, the terrorists win (unless you were going to vote for the terrorists, in which case they win anyway).
8. Because people in Iraq braved violence and long lines to vote for their ineffectual government, you don't have to brave either to vote for yours.
7. Because this year Al Franken will literally beat the shit out of you if you’re not wearing an “I Voted†sticker.
6. You would like a different politician lying to you for the next two/four/six years.
5. You want your voice to be heard, and the old woman down at the polling station can't leave her post so she'll have to listen.
4. You like to stand in line and pretend you're waiting for a Wii or Playstation III.
3. Perfect opportunity to check if your e-vote hack is in place.
2. Because you're tired of all the Republican scandals and abuses of power, and would like more Democratic scandals and abuses of power.
1. To relive those test taking days in college when you just filled in the circles randomly hoping to get some right.